Mike Has MS

 

Monday, October 27, 2008

The New Normal

Nobody ever said that having Multiple Sclerosis would be fun. I thought I knew what I was in for when we started chasing symptoms down six years ago. Oh, I had no idea.

Losing the feeling in my fingertips became the new normal. A few weeks ago, I was absolutely rejoicing when I had feeling in the fingertips of my left hand. That was short lived. And the chronic fatigue once wasn’t as bad as it is now. It seems I’m always tired, and I certainly turn into a pumpkin much earlier than I used to.

It wasn’t all that long ago that I’d be turning off the alarm clock and landing on my feet all in the same breath. Those days are long gone. I have to sit up on the end of my bed for a moment to get my equilibrium before standing up now. And then I can get up to take Reggie outside.

This is the new normal. It’s not fun. But it’s the hand I was dealt. I’m not complaining. This disease can be devastating, and I could have been dealt a MUCH worse hand. My rate of progression is relatively slow. Most of my symptoms are sensory. Very few of my symptoms are functional, aside from the random balance issues.  I’m okay with this. I’m not in a wheelchair, and I’m not using a cane. Yeah, I’m perfectly okay with that.

The past few weeks, I’ve been under some stress and pressure. I have no doubt that it’s related to my current fatigue. But a good, relaxing weekend helps that. This week is our annual SOX audit at work. Getting through that will be another burden off my shoulders.

Today is one of those days where I feel like my energy supply is going to be depleted by noon. Under normal circumstances, I’d have taken the day off work. But with auditors here, it’s not that easy. I’m going to push myself to my practical limits and then it’s time to stop. History has taught me the costs of pushing myself too far. I can spend an afternoon in bed or I can spend the rest of the week in bed. I’ll take the former, thank you.

Posted by Mike on 10/27 at 07:54 AM
Multiple SclerosisPermalink

Tuesday, October 14, 2008

Neuropsych

I went for some neuropsych evaluation a few weeks ago and then went back for the followup a week later. My final report came in the mail on Saturday.  There weren’t any surprises.

One of the things that really surprised me is that most of the things in the report have more to do with my ADD than my MS. It turns out I’m pretty smart. My visual-spacial skills are superior. There was one test that I particularly bombed. As we discussed it, she was telling me that the reason I bombed it was because instead of taking the test, I was trying to figure out how to beat the test. I have this tendency to figure out what the rules of the game are in order to win. It’s how I got through high school without being diagnosed with ADD, because I test well. 

When I took a test that was much more difficult, I did better. That seems to indicate that when I really focused on something, it was rather effective. That means my Strattera is working.

The whole thing was really quite interesting, and we now have a good baseline going forward. I’ve asked her to make sure that both my psychiatrist and neurologist get a copy of the report.

Posted by Mike on 10/14 at 08:16 PM
Multiple SclerosisPermalink
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About

My name is Mike Hillwig and I live in Boston with my pug, Reggie. I was diagnosed with Multiple Sclerosis in January 2003 but have been living with MS for much longer than that. This is where you'll find my story, stories, and my history.

I want this site to be a place where people can read about my experiences with MS. I was fortunate enough to catch it really early and my results on drug therapies have been outstanding. This should be a place where people can realize that they can lead a normal life with MS. MS has changed my life, but it hasn't ended it.

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